A. The general principles of a mature relationship:

• Matthew 7:12 (ESV, same as below) 'So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.'
How would you like to be treated by others?
1. You would like to be encouraged by others
2. You would like others to show gratitude towards you
3. You long to be forgiven by others
4. You need to be heard by others
5. You hope to be understood by others

B. Elements that destruct relationship:

1. Betrayal
2. Lack of understanding
3. Lack of listening
4. Hurriedness in making judgements
5. Envy
6. Denying responsibilities
7. Complaints
8. Inadequate resolution of conflicts
9. Selfishness, self-centredness, lack of compassion and humanity
10. Lies
11. Self-conceit
12. Resentment
13. Deceit
14. Cowardness/timidity

C. Elements that construct relationship:

1. Forgiveness
2. Self-sacrifice
3. Mercy
4. A servant's heart
5. Commitment
6. Adherence/Obedience to the group
7. Easy-going/Understanding
8. Selflessness
9. Sharing
10. Encouraging
11. Equality
12. Loyalty, devotion (to family), love, virtue
13. Confession of wrongdoings, acceptance
14. Abandonment of our own rights; obedience to the Lord
15. Faith
16. Unity
17. Loving kindness
18. Courage
19. Compassion
20. Generosity of heart

D. The secrets of protecting relationship:

1. Compassion
 Matthew 9:36 'When he saw the crowds, he had compassion for them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.'
 Matthew 14:14 'When he went ashore he saw a great crowd, and he had compassion on them and healed their sick.'
 Matthew 15:32 'Then Jesus called his disciples to him and said, "I have compassion on the crowd because they have been with me now three days and have nothing to eat. And I am unwilling to send them away hungry, lest they faint on the way."'
2. Grace
 Colossians 3:8 'But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth.'
 Luke 6:35 "But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return, and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, for he is kind to the ungrateful and the evil."
3. Humility
 Matthew 11:29 "Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls."
4. Gentleness
 Matthew 21:5 "Say to the daughter of Zion, 'Behold, your king is coming to you, humble, and mounted on a donkey, on a colt, the foal of a beast of burden.'"
5. Patience
 Romans 2:4 'Or do you presume on the riches and of kindness and forbearance ad patience, not knowing that God's kindness is meant to lead you to repentance?'
 1 Peter 3:20 'Because they formerly did not obey, when God's patience waited in the days of Noah, while the ark was being prepared, in which a few, that is, eight persons, were brought safely through water.'
6. Purity
 1 Timothy 5:22 'Do not be hasty in the laying on of hands, nor tak part in the sins of others; keep yourself pure.'
 1 John 3:3 'And everyone who thus hopes in him purifies himself as he is pure.'
7. Peace-loving
8. Gentleness (not quarrelsome)
 1 Timothy 3:3 'Not a drunkard, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money.'
9. Obedience
10. Mercy
 Ephesians 2:4 'But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us'
 Hebrews 4:16 'Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.'
11. Good fruits
12. Fairness
13. Honesty

Personal Relationship 3